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The Babysitter
By Steve Rosse
October 2007
When they excavated the ruins of Pompeii in 1748, the archeologists made plaster casts of the impressions that the dying citizens of that city made in the soft ash as it smothered them.  While the inevitable couples locked in intercourse have since garnered most of the world’s notice, to me the most poignant image has always been that of a young girl caught by the toxic snowfall in the act of running with an infant in her arms.

The girl was about 13 when she died, and the baby about a year old.  The girl was wearing iron bands on her ankles and the infant had solid gold bracelets, so archeologists have deduced that she was not a relative but a slave, and most likely the baby’s nanny.  I have always wondered about what kind of devotion drove the chattel to sacrifice her last mortal moments in a futile effort to save her oppressor.
 

In the months to come, that devotion may become more apparent.  When my wife and I drove home from Ranong to Phuket last month, the car was sagging dangerously close to the pavement from the weight of two more passengers than it had carried on the way up.  Besides the original three passengers: myself, Mem and our son Andy, there was our new daughter Mandy, whose three kilograms probably had more effect on our little car’s cheap suspension than you might imagine, and Pui, a 13-year-old girl from a poor family who live on a farm next to Mem’s daddy’s plantation.

Pui was brought to the hospital the day before Mem checked out, dressed in a Harley Davidson T-shirt and carrying her one other outfit, plus a comb, toothbrush and three old comic books in a paper shopping bag.  Mem had whined to her family for a week that you just can’t find good help these days on Phuket, so the family decided that we needed help too young to complain, too young to steal and possibly a little too Burmese to run away.

Of course I immediately put my foot down.  “There’s no way we’re taking a 13-year-old girl into our house,” I said politely but firmly.

“It’s too late,” Mem answered.  “We’ve already given her family 1,000 baht and given my father 1,500 baht for finding her.”

When Mem checked into the hospital, she put all of her jewelry and money into my computer bag, and despite the fact that all of her gold made the bag so heavy that I had to avoid wooden floors, I carried that boat anchor around on my shoulder for the whole two weeks we were in Ranong.  Mem could not yet get out of bed unassisted; how she managed to sneak the money out of my bag and into her father’s fist was beyond me.  And I thought the finder’s fee a little high.  Mem’s Daddy is the palad amphur (deputy district chief) in Ranong; by rights 1,500 baht should have bought me the motorcycle taxi concession outside the post office.

And how much are we going to pay Pui?” I asked.

“Pay her?” answered my wife.  “She’s too young to work for money.  We can’t pay her; that would be illegal.  We’ll feed her and give her a place to sleep; if she’s good with the children, I’ll give her some of my old clothes.”
 

RESOURCE LINKS FOR THAILAND
About Moving to Thailand
A directory of articles, job resources, and links. We also have sections on ESL & overseas teaching jobs on our directory.
Articles On Living & Investing in Thailand
Articles On Living & Investing In Thailand - Also Including Articles On Real Estate In Thailand.
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See banks of Thailand at our Banks of Asian Pacific section.
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A selection of books related to finding employment in Thailand, housing in Thailand and resources for living in Thailand. Includes selected cultural and travel books for Thailand.
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Thailand has a special place for the offshore investor/account holder. If your business is in this region, then you must consider Thailand for your banking needs. Be sure to research their stock market as well.
Embassies & Consulates of Thailand
Embassy Resources for Thailand - On our sister site EmbassyWorld.
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Media & News Resources for Thailand Newspapers, magazines, online resources and news channels with current Thailand information.
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Hospitals Around The World by Region.
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Real Estate in Thailand.
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A Guide To Living, Retiring, Working and Doing Business in Thailand
“Doesn’t she have to go to school?”
“She’s finished the sixth grade.  Her family can’t pay for her any more.”

“What will the neighbors say?”

“If she’s good with the children, they’ll try to steal her away from us.  Whenever you talk to the neighbors about Pui, be sure to complain a lot.”

“I think I can handle that.  But she’s pretty cute, what the heck are my friends going to think?”

“Do they have any reason to think anything?”

“Huh?  No!  Baby, you know I’ve never looked at another woman.  I only subscribe to Playboy for the fiction.”

“Then it’s settled.  Put her stuff in the car.”

It was one of those arguments that no amount of my studying Thai or Mem studying English could solve.  I suppose I could look up the injunction against slavery in the Talmud or the Constitution of the United States and show them to Mem, but she wouldn’t see them as relevant.  I suppose she could point out to me the limited choices a dirt-poor 13-year-old girl with no citizenship documents has in this country, but I wouldn’t accept them as inevitable.  And Pui seems to be thrilled to death with her new job, though that’s probably not the right word for her position in our family.

All the way back from Ranong I could see her bucktoothed grin in the back seat, between my daughter and my son, as she played with Andy.  Keeping a toddler amused when he’s lashed into a car seat for five hours is a Sisyphean task, but Pui handled it like a hero.  And my son arrived back home in Phuket absolutely smitten with Phi Pui.  Now he won’t go to bed unless she sings him to sleep.  The song she sings is the jingle from a hair-conditioner commercial, but Andy doesn’t seem to mind. 

And so I keep thinking of that nameless slave girl who unwittingly became immortalized in an act of selfless devotion in the midst of one of the most terrible natural disasters to ever befall the human race.  My wife and I have lost two cats to the cobras that live in the jungle behind our house, and the neighbors have lost a dog to the ten-wheel trucks that use our soi as a shortcut between the gravel quarries on the mainland and the construction sites in town.  By making Pui our nanny we have entrusted the people we love most in the world into her small, brown, un-emancipated hands.  All we can count on is whatever made that little Pompeian slave pick up the Master’s baby and try to outrun the lava and the falling ash.
 

Steve Rosse is the author of two books on Thailand; Thai vignettes and
Expat Days: making a Life in Thailand.  See www.bangkokbooks.com
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Patients Beyond Borders - Did you know that 150,000 Americans now travel abroad every year for affordable, high-quality health care?  From Thailand’s American-accredited Bumrungrad hospital to Eric Clapton’s Crossroads Clinic to Johns Hopkins International, health travelers now have a full array of the world’s safest, best choices in healthcare facilities and physicians.  Now available to assist with this growing movement, Patients Beyond Borders is the first comprehensive, easy-to-understand guide to medical tourism.  It’s also a first-rate manual for overseas travel—impartial, extensively researched, and filled with authoritative and accessible advice—carefully culled from hundreds of resources here and abroad.
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