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Firstly, I just wanted to quickly thank people for having taken the time to read my first article, I’m glad you enjoyed it.  The responses were very flattering and I’ve tried to reply personally to as many people as I could - as you can imagine, that wasn’t an easy task, given the vast quantity of complimentary e-Mails I subsequently received.  Well, there were at least ten...  I wanted to write this article as a follow up though because – in a two word summation – Bermuda’s changed.  Quite noticeably too (for expats working here) and not necessarily for the better.  I did want to caution anyone who might be thinking of coming to work here that the situation here may not currently be what you might imagine it to be and although my previous article was accurate at that time, an update is definitely required.  Bermuda International Airport Customs & Immigration The very first `Bermudian’ encounter you will have (endure) is Customs & Immigration at Bermuda International Airport.  You will be extremely lucky to have a good experience at this point.  You will potentially queue for a very, very long time.  Possibly hours.  No, definitely hours.  Every single item in your luggage will be scrutinised.  You will be questioned ad nauseum about any electronic / medical item or medications you possess.  My own personal experience was as follows:  Leave Ireland at 4am to get into Bermuda 18 hours later.  Barely able to stand with tiredness now have to contend with none-too-pally malevolent-looking sniffer dog.  Queue for an absolute eternity.  Finally, me and my two big blue suitcases get to the point of no return.  Customs official queries every single electronic item I possess – mobile phone; digicam; iPod; walkman as well as my CDs. `How much did this cost?’ - `I have no idea, my digicam and iPod were gifts’, he glares at me and promptly takes off with his colleague, tells me he’s going to look up the prices on the Internet and leaves me there for another hour (whilst I stood outside listening to them laughing in another room).  Anyone who’s going through this is looking around empathetically at everyone else going through the same thing.  One girl had a Customs official take out – and hold up high in the air for all to see – her lingerie.  Said official spent an inordinate amount of time doing this and the poor girl could do nothing but stand there.  A man beside me looked over and said to me `surely there’s no necessity for that’ (the stranger-bonding set in motion).  But enough about her, back to me and my problems.  Customs official eventually returns to me, informing me I now `owe’ $76 to Customs, which of course I can’t pay from that queue, I now have to traipse elsewhere to queue for the third time that evening (prior to all this, I had been brought into a different room to wait there to have my work permit checked by Immigration officials).  Given that I’d purchased my Walkman previously in Bermuda, I’ve now paid double-duty on it.  He went through my CDs and told me I owed money on each one of those(!).  Between the queuing; Cujo; the aggressive and rude officials; the endless – and pointless - questioning; the embarrassment of having everything I possess being inspected belligerently by some stranger, I left there (hours later) feeling like some kind of lowlife felon (I did wonder at one point if our pilot hadn’t gotten his flight schedule mixed up and landed us in Tel Aviv – because guns aside, the hostile atmosphere was not dissimilar).   By the time I got out of there, I was feeling more than a little bit hostile myself... I was told that evening that Customs have a profile of who to single out for `inspection’ at the airport.  I, evidently, matched the profile on the day – but the profile changes.  I was also told that I was `lucky’ I had to only pay $76, as others have paid double that.  Yes, that’s how I felt all right – lucky. The Bank of Butterfield now has a facility at the airport whereby you can pay your customs duty via Butterfield Direct ATM, located in the HM Customs area of the airport. I was told last night that one of my friends took her mother to the airport – to depart Bermuda – a few days ago.  Her mother was pulled aside and had all of her belonging inspected (dirty laundry included).  My friend said that although the Customs officials were nice about it, it was still hugely embarrassing (queue of people behind with no screen for privacy) and time-consuming for her mother.  When my friend asked the officials if were they searching everyone exiting Bermuda, they said that they were not but that people selected for inspection had had their names randomly generated via computer.  Customs confiscated items such as hair spray, etc and as my friend said, had her mother known they were going to do that, she wouldn’t have purchased those items in Bermuda in the first place because they’re far more expensive than in the UK. Landing Permit A landing permit costs $27.00.  A penalty of $125.00 is payable if you arrive in Bermuda and do not have sufficient travel documents. Agency Accommodation There is at least one employment agency on the island that places their staff coming over here into temporary accommodation.  It is a fairly large house with eight bedrooms – three large and five very small, it depends on availability on your arrival where you’ll end up.  Four bathrooms are shared (one bathroom is right next to the kitchen, those two tenants have to walk through the kitchen each time they need to use their bathroom.  Their toilet is right beside the cooker, with a door between).  One very small kitchen with few utensils or crockery; no laundry facilities whatsoever and no living room.  TVs in each room with 3 channels and not great reception.  Telephone in kitchen is coin operated and allows local calls only – you cannot make international calls (despite every girl in the house being from a country other than Bermuda).  Heating / AirCon is not provided, you must buy your own and if you get AirCon installed in your room, you will pay extra in rent.  The house is located about a fifteen minute bus ride from Hamilton ($55 per month for bus pass) but in rush hour or in bad traffic, the journey can take well over an hour.  Should you complain to the agency (electricity blowout; no water; toilets being blocked; bad bath plumbing; insects, etc.), you face the prospect of being told it’s `too bad, put up with it or leave’ or just receiving an eviction notice hand-delivered with no warning to your place of work.  Another point the agency has made – more than once - is that it is `temporary’ accommodation only, and staff are supposed to stay there short term until they find their own accommodation.  However, the reality of the situation is that temps are not paid enough money to be able to afford to move out onto Bermuda’s current realty market.  Some girls have moved out obviously but the majority of their pay cheque is then spent on their rent and utilities.  So, effectively, you’re stuck in that house, and you’d better not complain about it, if you do, you will just be moved out of there and into a host family.  This could work to your advantage, but that’s highly unlikely from what I’ve heard.  The other alternative is to return to your home country – which many girls do these days, and sharpish.  I’ve recently been told of a girl coming over here and she was informed she will be sharing her bedroom with three other girls. Host Families Agency staff are either put into the afore-mentioned accommodation initially or situated with host families on the island.  My personal experiences years ago of host families have been okay actually, in retrospect (and definitely by comparison to other girls).  You’re living in someone else’s home for the short term, so you’ve got to respect their rules.  At one point, I stayed with a lovely couple out on a farm.  They treated me very well, were really sweet to me and it was a complete novelty to have their laid-back horse mooching around outside my window now and again.  As usual though, there are pros and cons to everything.  I did hear from one friend that her landlord would not give her a key to the house and if she came home post-11pm (I’m just thinking about that girl now and smiling realising that had she ever come home pre-11pm, I’d be shocked to the core), she’d be locked out – she ended up spending at least one night that I’m aware of sleeping in the garden.  - Article Continued Below -

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I’ve heard other horror stories too, but what are your options?  You’ve got the house that the agency puts eight girls in (not even remotely affectionately known as Amityville); you’ve got your host family situation – that’s pretty much a hit and miss scenario or you can spend a very large chunk of your savings on extortionate rentals whilst having zero guarantee of constant income.

House Sits
Lots of people do house sits for home owners on the island (in fact, I know two people who currently `live’ from house sit to house sit.  That is to say that they do not actually rent a place or have a base in which to live on the island).  I have personally never done a house sit anywhere in my life (being firmly convinced that knowing my luck, some catastrophe would without a shadow of a doubt befall said residence with me in it.  Some girls though have ended up doing weeks / months at a time, in beautiful apartments or houses with pools; gardens, etc. and having a really nice time of it.

Rent
You can expect to pay – at the very minimum - $1,200 per month now in Bermuda.  This would possibly cover you for a house-share only, if even.  Studios are in the region of $1,800 and up and one bedroom apartments go for about $2,500 upwards [all predominantly exclusive of utilities].  These are conservative figures really and as with anywhere, the closer you live in town, the more expensive your rent will be ( www.bermuda.e-moo.com ).

Employment
I’ve never quite gotten used to the preface `The company hiring for this position is interested in receiving applications from Bermudians / Spouses of Bermudians only’ prominently displayed on most positions advertised in Bermuda and it often strikes me that if companies in almost any other country in the world discriminated so openly, they’d find themselves in court.  Imagine - `The company hiring for this position is interested in receiving applications from English / Spouses of English only.’  Hmm, I think not.

When you start working in Bermuda – especially if you’re used to working in large cities, possibly for bigger, dynamic, multinational organisations, the first thing you’ve got to get used to is the laid back - `it’ll be done when it’s done’ attitude.  I found that chronically difficult to adjust to initially.  I’m a do-er and like to get things done expeditiously (to the point of getting on my own nerves sometimes).  I remember in the beginning almost having apoplexy with frustration though.  Finally, after many months, it dawned on me that if I didn’t just chill out, I’d end up doing 25 to life for homicide.  So, chill out I did.  I’m not in any way saying that every company over here is like that but it’s certainly been my experience and that of quite a few other people that I know working here.

Agency Work
Should you decide to come to Bermuda as a temporary secretary via an agency, there are a few issues that you should be aware of.  Although it will state on your work permit that you will be employed as an Executive Secretary, you may find yourself actually doing office management / legal audio / corporate administration / hedge fund administration / reception work / filing / mail delivery, etc.  I’ve been speaking to a girl who said she came over here with a bad cold and despite telling the agency she was unable to work, they still forced her to go in.  Another girl told me that she’d flown halfway cross the world to get here on a very long distance flight and was informed that she was working the day she arrived in to Bermuda.  Although they state that they have an `open door’ policy, should you complain about your work situation to the agency, you will pretty much get the same response as above – if you don’t like it, leave.  Should you commit even the slightest infraction – or sometimes do nothing at all wrong, they might just take a dislike to you for no reason – you face being moved around from job to job, two days work here, three days there and most definitely not doing Executive Secretarial work.  That’s the punishment meted out.  There are far fewer permanent EA / PA roles for expats in Bermuda now, you may end up temping for much longer than your six month contract.  It’s not unheard of for girls to be temping for a year or more, in fact, these days, it’s more the rule than the exception.  I did hear that one CEO had made a speech to his staff about cutting work permit applications for expats by half. 

There are also far fewer expats in Bermuda now, with many more set to leave once the six-year rule kicks in (effectively, you’ve got six years to work on the island of Bermuda, after that you must leave if you’re an expat. It’s obviously more complicated than that but, not a lot.).  Also, if you do get a permanent job here now, at the end of your six months temping, your prospective employer can advertise for a Bermudian to work in the position.   They have three months to do that (should a Bermudian then want the job, you’re back to square one).

Even after all of this, your work permit application papers must then go to Immigration, and since there is a five-month backlog there currently (I had an e-Mail from a friend of mine to say her work permit renewal application has been with Immigration now for almost six months, when she enquired about it, she was informed that Immigration had lost her file and had absolutely no record of her.  She effectively has to start the process from scratch, despite living in Bermuda for years), it could be a very long time indeed before you see your first decent pay cheque.  You can be `fast-tracked’ evidently, but I hear the fast tracks take a long time to process as well.  Also, it appears to be more common these days for work permit applications to actually be denied (with no reason given).

You will discover that the terms of your contract are one-sided in the extreme – and not in your favour.  Unless you’re willing to shut up and put up, you’re signing up for not a great situation to find yourself in initially – ie. your work and housing is under the control of one agency and you will be living under veiled (or indeed overt) threats of eviction or no work at all times.  As I mentioned in my previous article, you will need to get over this mentally - and quickly.  After your six-months temping has finished, you can then start applying for permanent positions (via the agency only) – but good luck with that...

Customer Service
They say that customer service in Bermuda is at an all time low.  But, to be fair, that’s not just the case in Bermuda if you ask me.  You get good sales staff, you get bad sales or service industry staff no matter where you go, that appears to be par for the course.  One girl I know here however was waiting with her boyfriend to be served in a restaurant.  The waiter arrived but when he discovered she was English actually said to her `Oh, if I’d known you weren’t Bermudian, I wouldn’t have served you’.  What can you say about that really...

For what you get in Bermuda now, there are certainly more exotic and less expensive places about.  I remember when I was trying to book a flight from Dublin to here – one of my friends was booking a flight to Australia from Dublin and she was getting cheaper fare quotes than I was!  One of our other friends was going to South Africa – again for less than my flight to Bermuda.  That’s always stuck with me.  If I ask people generally about their attitude to Bermuda or coming to Bermuda, they invariably answer `too expensive’.

Mobile Phones
I have yet to meet anyone here who is happy with their mobile phone service or service provider.  The pay as you go option just seems to require topping up every twenty seconds, irrespective of how little you utilise your mobile... One three second phone call seems to cost $300m.  You pay for incoming international calls too.  Don’t get me started on texting - the texts may get to the recipient, or may not.  You may get a reply, or not – or you may receive said reply months later... or.  not.  This is all despite the service provider stating that you actually had the international texting facility at time of purchase.  I know one girl on the contracted rate though who got a bill of over $700 unexpectedly (her reaction was more than a tad amusing – sufficed to say it involved hyperventilation and many, many high-pitched `oh my gawd’s).
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Medical Insurance
You will pay $21.71 minimum per week in medical insurance now (unless you choose Major Medical, which would cost you a lot more).  This `insurance’ however does not cover doctors visits; prescriptions, etc.  HIP insurance covers you for procedures / testing in the local hospital with a few outside facilities included for lab work etc.  So, in fact, it covers you for very little and to me seems like a total and complete waste of money. 

Sports and Social Life
Bermuda is the place to be if you’re into sports – especially water sports - diving; snorkelling; sailing; wind surfing etc. or beach volleyball and golf, etc.

I’m not a sporty kinda gal, never was but my social skills are remarkably well-honed now at this stage.  In fact, I’ve got a little bit of a reputation on th’island as being somewhat of a chanteuse... Well, not really, but I have been known to hog a microphone or two in the Hog Penny (post-at least three alcoholic beverages).
The happy hours; booze cruises and beach parties can be good fun but after a while, they get a bit monotonous and you feel like you’ve done them to death.  And watch out for those boys, girls.  They’ll break you heart every time...  A little bit of a playboy’s paradise is Bermuda.  I could write a book on the stories I’ve heard here.  Some very funny stories, some not so much.  How tempted am I to name and shame...

There is a kind of ATM DVD rental system that they’ve got here in Bermuda ( www.muvi.bm ).  It’s really handy and easy to join.  I had a few issues in the beginning, but I think they were just teething problems, and they were sorted out really quickly.  Worth a mention I think as it’s an invaluable service if you live outside of Hamilton – and especially during the winter months.  Their customer service is very efficient too.

Beaches
Bermuda’s beaches are still beautiful, and I’m still in awe of them.  However, Hurricane Fabian has left it’s mark.  I’ve always preferred the expanse of Elbow Beach but in the latest opinion poll of my esteemed cronies, they all said that they preferred Horseshoe... all of them – which I thought was odd (or is it me that’s odd...).  I’m reliably informed that Tobacco Bay is the place to go for snorkelling.  Tobacco Bay’s not my cup of tea though and as for snorkelling, that just sounds like it might involve exercise of some sort, and I’m definitely not up for that... 

In any event, whichever beach you go to, be careful of the jelly fishes... jelly fish.  Whatever the plural is, coz there’s definitely more than one of ‘em...  I’m fairly certain that they have snazzier, jazzier names over here but a rose by any other name an’ all that... They’re translucent too – how unfair is that?  They should really be bright red or cerise pink or something, give the swimmer at least a fighting chance... I’m told the fall out from a sting ain’t pretty and is really painful and I don’t do pain. 
Traffic

Traffic in Bermuda is much more concentrated than it was five years ago.  The scooter is probably your best option, definitely in the summer (not so much in the winter).  It’s not unusual anymore to sit on a bus (sit on a bus if you can get a seat that is) for well over an hour.  This is primarily in rush hour of course but rush hour appears to have inexplicably extended to rush-three-hour (as in anywhere from 6.30 am to 9.30 am and 4.30pm to 7.30pm).  There is quite an amount of construction going on in Bermuda now of course and obviously, more (and larger) trucks on the island as a result.

Overall 
I’ve always said that some of the nicest people I’ve ever met are Bermudians.  The kids are brought up to be really polite.  Men / boys / kids generally still get up and offer their seats to girls / women on public transport.  The helpful manner is still there, if possibly less evident.  Unfortunately now though, the overall attitude of Bermudians towards expat workers has definitely changed.  The hostility is absolutely more pronounced, more palpable.  Not sure how or why that’s happened but it has happened and a lot of people remark on it.  There is a radio station here that has actually had people calling in to say that they thought the `guest workers’ on the island are responsible for the lack of affordable accommodation.  Some things that you’ll hear actually are quite blatantly offensive.

I spoke to a guy yesterday who told me that last week he’d been standing at an ATM here in Hamilton.  There was a white guy there and a black (English) couple behind him.  He said that at the point he’d arrived at the machine, the girl was saying to the white guy `... that’s no reason for you to call me a nig**r’.  The guy I was speaking to said that he was so shocked, he stopped with his ATM card mid-air...
Both my articles on Bermuda have been based on my own experiences – what I’ve done, what I’ve seen and heard around the island, etc.  This article is aimed mainly at girls planning to work in Bermuda on a temporary basis initially.  Clearly, those who come to work in Bermuda on a permanent basis straight off will have more varied experiences.

I’ve been asked so many times since my last article if I would recommend Bermuda as a place to come and work.  I used to always say `yes’, without hesitation. 

My answer now would though would have to be `no’.
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