| Brazil
Or Bust Part III |
| by Andy
Neill |
| September
2005
To quickly
recap previous installments of my continuing saga, I came to Fortaleza,
Brazil in January 2004, following much research and after a rather tough
divorce, determined to discover another life…a better life!
My first stay
was a month back in January of 2004. After a couple of months back
in North America, I was ready for chapter two. I came back to Fortaleza
in May and, except for August, have been here since.
I pick up the
story, as I’m about to leave for Canada and the US on the 1st of August. |
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| Leaving
Fortaleza and my Brasileira girlfriend, Thieny was very difficult.
I had misgivings about the trip back to North America, first of all because
I REALLY didn’t want to leave Fortaleza, and secondly because the main
reason for going back to Toronto was not clear. To explain a little, my
85-year-old
mother had developed Alzheimer’s and could no longer live on her own.
My siblings
and I had talked about when and how to move her to an assisted living home
in New Brunswick, where she had lived most of her life, but the timing
was not yet clear. The main part of my trip, I thought, would be taken
up with moving my mother to a new home and dealing with the condo where
she had lived in Burlington, near Toronto, and it’s contents.
As it turned
out, my mother had already moved to the her new home by the time I got
to Toronto on the first of August and the only real work I got to take
part in was dividing up contents in the condo, which I could have done
by phone from Brazil - which would have saved me a large sum of money,
as I already had a return ticket to the US and Canada, required if you
are not a permanent resident. |
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| My ticket
was dated for October but got blown off in this process, so basically I
had already lost around US$400!. I did visit with my daughters and son
in Toronto for a week or two, before heading to San Diego to try and pare
down the amount of “stuff” I had in storage there.
The last
couple of weeks of August were probably the most difficult I've had in
the past couple of years. Not only was I away from Thieny, and the
rest of my friends in Brazil, but also still dealing with my ex-wife and
trying desperately to divide up “things” so that I could at least fit them
in a smaller storage space were very unpleasant tasks!
Thieny and
I still remember one night in particular when, feeling really down, I stayed
a little too long drinking wine at my hotel in San Diego, InnSuites in
Hillcrest - they offer great service and great wine. |
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Offshore
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| I called Thieny
in Brazil when I got back to my room, completely forgetting about the time
difference! It was 1am in Fortaleza! I went on for some time trying to
tell her how unhappy I was, and she told me later that, even though she
still did not speak much English, or I Portuguese, she could hear my loneliness
and frustration at having to be so far away.
After reducing
the number of my belongings in storage in San Diego to the point they fit
the minimum size available…things I either couldn’t sell, give away or
didn’t feel comfortable giving up, no one was happier to climb back on
a plane to Brazil than I was at the end of August! I had arranged for
my friend Mark to come to the airport. I had called Thieny and she
said she would come to the airport as well.
When I came
through the international arrivals area at Pinto Martins Airport in Fortaleza,
Mark was there, but I really didn’t even notice him! Beside him stood this
incredibly beautiful lady, with the dark Morena coloring and jet-black
hair and brown eyes, with the exotic face, and wearing a gorgeous white
dress and high heels and carrying a white handbag. |
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was the first time I had seen her dressed up completely and my jaw must
have dropped a foot!
I was very
glad to be back, to say the least! Mark took my bags in his truck and
Thieny and I took a taxi. We all arrived at my apartment at the same time
and I was home!
During the
next couple of weeks, talking with Thieny, my thoughts on our future together
became clearer, and I realized even more strongly how much I wanted us
to be together.
This decision
was not easily made, because Thieny had a 4-year old son, Israel, and anything
we decided had to include him. As Thieny pointed out, most men, particularly
those who come to Brazil in search of a female companion, either short
or long term, are not much interested in having an instant family. |
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Offshore
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| Having a family
in Fortaleza was exactly what I wanted so the decision became much easier…not
totally simple, but easier, and the third week in September, I asked Thieny
to marry me. Thankfully, she said yes!
The next
part of the saga becomes very interesting in terms of what can be done
when you know someone who can bend rules.
Most of what
I had seen written about getting married to a Brazilian told me I should
start the process while outside the country and have all documents translated
officially into Portuguese, which had caused problems for many who contributed
postings on-line to forums like the one at http://www.brazzilforum.com.
I was already
living in Fortaleza, had just spent a month in North America and had no
desire to go back there!
I learned of
a person who spoke and taught English and did translations, although not
official ones, and upon meeting him, was recommended to a Brazilian who
could help me. The connection with this “fixer”, Ze Braulio, turned out
to be a very mixed blessing and you will read more later about the problems
Gringos can run into caused by not speaking the language completely.
The translator,
whom I will not name, plus Ze, Thieny and I had many conversations about
timing and document handling plus translation. Some money changed hands
and we were able to sign the initial papers for Casamento or official marriage
on September 24th at a Cartorio…basically a glorified Brazilian Notary
Public…in a small town outside Fortaleza. As for documents, I will just
say this: much time was filled with searching for documents in North America,
as well as waiting for official translations and so on, but finally, we
were able to make a last trip to the small town down the coast to sign
the final documents before the official at the Cartorio. That was on October
29th. One other thing about the documents I used. I was able to accomplish
the marriage without having the obligatory police record check from Canada!
Some rules can be bent a little.
Thieny and
I (along with Israel) began life as a married couple, living in one of
the most exciting cities in the world. We had been living together since
around the first of September in my apartment, containing a suite (bedroom
with attached bath) and another bedroom and bathroom, at that time still
on the 13th floor of a condo building three blocks from the warm South
Atlantic off Beira Mar, the Oceanside avenida. Israel had been spending
a good many days at his grandmother’s home but moved to the apartment for
good when school started.
He began attending
first grade at a private school in Aldeota in September.
In the next
installment, more about getting things done in Brazil when you speak only
a little Portuguese! Also some insights into Brasileiras who, I think,
are probably the most complicated women in the world!
The following
articles are the previous articles Andy wrote for the magazine:
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Article
Index ~ Brazil
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