One very noticeable difference between China and Taiwan is that Taiwanese women frequently have fuller bottoms. I’ve only been in the country a month, so my studies on the issue are hardly authoritative, yet the difference is pronounced. Fuller – not especially in the width and height dimensions; it’s in the depth department, in that mysterious and so hard to draw z axis. Is it a sign of more affluence in Taiwan, that greater comfort and security allows women’s bottoms to flesh out? 

Perhaps, but I am increasingly of the opinion that many women here are flaunting their bottoms, sticking them out a fraction, even carrying them with a knowing swagger.

I barely remember being aware of bottoms in China. The aim, Chinese girls said, was to have a small bum and long hair – it was straightforward. A bottom verging on the medium size should be covered up with a loose skirt, or tightened in with unloose trousers. In Taiwan, the bottom and all its sensuality has been liberated; bottoms wink at me as their owners walk away.

Taiwanese bottoms have mystery and double meanings; they are like a lot of things in Taiwan in that regard. In China, not that it wasn’t continually frustrating and complex, but it was generally somehow straightforward. Crazy, infuriating things would happen, but in predictable ways.

Take visas as an example. It wasn’t always easy in Kunming to get the visa you wanted, but there was a series of steps and options that everyone knew. 

In Taiwan, it feels like no one knows.

Another example is schools. In Kunming, it took thirty seconds to work out if another teacher had a better gig than you. What’s the hourly rate, the location, do they pay on time, are the students nice? 

In Taiwan, it’s impossible to work that out in half an hour. What’s the mandatory preparation time for each lesson? Do they expect you to do that preparation on the premises? Is there homework to mark? Are there exams to mark? What’s the penalty for arriving late? Is it a five or six day week?

I think that part of all this mystery in Taiwan is that in China, people are so desperately running around trying to get the upper hand on you, they miss the bigger picture. People will argue with you over 5 RMB an hour; in Taiwan they’ll probably agree to your demand, then inform you later of ten extra conditions that make the job far worse. It feels crazy to talk about mainland Chinese being somehow naive, given how expert and tough so many of them were at bargaining and business. Yet, compared to more nebulous, relaxed places like Taiwan (and Thailand) the Chinese are a little innocent, a little unaware of how people really think and want. China beats you down and takes the cash from your pocket, while Taiwan greets you with a smile - only later you realise your credit card is gone.

PS I am using "Taiwanese" and "Chinese" very loosely, because I am very ignorant. Taiwanese people have a long history, their own language, were ruled by the Japanese for a while, were independent very briefly I think and then in 1949 Chiang Kai-shek and his nationalists arrived, escaping their defeat by Mao. Once I understand the situation better, I will be more precise - right now I am using "Taiwanese" and "Chinese" to indicate differences between people in China and people in Taiwan, and "Chinese" on its own when I am discussing Taiwan in isolation, to talk about the vaguely similar Chinese culture that stretches across many countries. Sorry about that.

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