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What Doesn't Kill You... 
Noel Kempff National Park, Bolivia
By Mark McMahon
"The most isolated, pristine and spectacular National Park in the country and one the most remote wilderness regions in all of South America." 

The Huanchaca Plateau, rising 500 meters from the floor of the surrounding rainforest was the inspiration for Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's novel The Lost World. 

Those were my inspirations for wanting to visit Noel Kempff National Park. "Rustic accommodations and basic meals." That's what the park brochure promised. The perfect little eco-lodge from which to emerge each day to snap a few award-winning wildlife photos... so I thought.

The reality was not so kind. "The majority of visitors to the park arrive by chartered airplane" should have been a big clue. But no, we decided driving there would be an adventure. It was beyond adventure, bordering on nightmare. Nitsche said, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." I don't think he mentions that it may also make you really, really irritated. 

The expedition party (although 'party' is certainly a misnomer) consisted of me, my sister Patty and Pancho, my Bolivian pal. Once inside the park, we were joined by our mandatory park guide, Juan. He was a friendly fellow and an excellent guide but he did not have the latest data on situations in the park. He was not really to blame for the fact that the compound for lodging visitors was locked up and deserted.

This meant that we would have to survive on a bag of rice, some beef jerky and a hunk of salty cheese that smelled like a dirty sock. 

It was indeed a disheartening realization after all we had gone through to get there.

Fifteen hours on a deteriorated dirt road, partially overtaken by jungle.

The jungle has an amazing life force. In a matter of months it can practically reclaim a road. The space gets strangled from all directions.

There were sprouts coming up from the ground, branches growing in from both sides and shoots descending down, seemingly from the sky. 

In Mexico, atop the pyramids at Chitzen Itza, you can see other pyramids and what was once an entire city, completely over-taken by the creeping green.

Stuck in the mud for three hours we became aware of another life force: Insects!

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And it did not take three hours for them to make their presence known. In fact, if you stood still for 30 seconds you would have a swarm of bees, wasps, butterflies and assorted other critters orbiting your head and periodically touching down for landing.

Picture if you will, the sun beating down on a hot and muggy day. Struggling to raise Blanco Billy (my Landcruiser) out of the mud enough to create a path of logs under the tires. The more you sweat, the more insects you attract. Bees are crawling under your clothes and in your ears! Getting stung seven or eight times. Emergency road service is nothing short of fantasy, given our location and lack of means of communication

The kicker is seeing the path AROUND the mudhole big enough for a semi! Pancho was driving and had failed to notice the blatantly obvious detour. This was probably the reason he was working so silently and diligently in spite of the heat and the bugs. I, on the other hand, had to take a break every two or three minutes, to run away and escape my own personal swarm.

At the rate of progress we were making, we may very well have been there an additional three hours had it not been for a couple of park rangers happening along in a pick-up truck. They were able to yank us out of with a towrope in fairly short order. 

At the abandoned compound we resorted to breaking and entering to get bedding materials and drinking water out of a storage room. We got into the kitchen to encounter a thriving ecosystem. It included ants, roaches, moths and couple of very large frogs. The jungle again, asserting it's territorial rights.

Given our food supply and preparation facilities, it was unanimous that our scheduled five-day stay would be shortened to two. At least this would allow us to experience two highlights of the park, La Meseta and El Encanto.

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La Meseta is the plateau and El Encanto is a spectacular waterfall that spills off of the plateau.

The white arrow on the right is the top of the waterfall. We hiked to the base of it for a refreshing swim. The following day we hiked to the top of the mesa from the other side, see arrow on the left. 

Driving toward El Encanto, a fallen tree presented another challenge for Blanco Billy. It required a few more hours of labor but fortunately it was in a cooler area with less insects. We had to dig a hole in the road in order to drive under the tree.

Many times I had to ask myself, "What have I gotten my baby sister into??" She was pushed close to her limit a time or two, but all in all, she was a remarkably good sport. On the way out of the park, at the ranger station, she discovered a small infestation of ticks on her body. (Somehow I was spared their onslaught.) In the relative comfort and cleanliness of the ranger station we were able to deal with the situation. Had she discovered the ticks deep in the jungle, she said she might have really lost it. 

And there was no love lost between Patty and Macho Pancho by the end of the trip. Pancho is a good friend, and had the best of intentions, but his Bolivian machismo wore thin with independent Patty.

I am, however, happy to report that she is still on speaking terms with me. All part of the family fun and adventure.

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