 “We’re going where?”
My first reaction to my husband’s proposal of accepting an international assignment in South Korea was one of shock, curiosity, and excitement. After the initial thoughts, feelings, and questions had been sorted out, we were on our way to accepting an adventure that would change our lives.
Having been our first international assignment, the next few months were packed with cultural training for expatriates, making arrangements for selling our home, gathering medical and school records, and planning for our first visit to Korea. In the midst of adventure, feelings of uncertainty arose almost every day.
As the day drew closer to saying our goodbyes to family and friends, my husband, teenage son and I were ready for a life to begin in a culture so often mistaken for a land of rice fields and poverty. Well, at least that was our perception of South Korea.
The Adventure Begins
Our preliminary trip in May of 2005 proved to be an exciting one - seeing all the sights of the big city, while searching for schools, houses, and becoming familiar with all of the shopping areas (the shopping was enjoyable for me, but not my husband).
After spending ten days in Seoul and the surrounding cities, we boarded our flight home and eagerly started our list of things to do before our final move.
Three months later, our plane arrived in Seoul International Airport and we were greeted by a pleasant looking Asian man apprehensively waving a board with the words “Welcome Farley’s.”
One of the major decisions we agreed upon was to live outside the big city of Seoul and reside in an area where we would be forced to assimilate with the Korean culture. Our choice was also a midpoint between our son’s school and my husband’s workplace. The city of Seongnam was a mix of modern western culture and traditional Korea. About thirty miles outside of Seoul, the large city of Bundang was to be our home for the next two years.
After a few months of settling into our new life thousands of miles from home, we were beginning to feel comfortable with our weekly trips to the supermarket (although many Koreans shop for their meals on a daily basis, and always looked in our cart as we loaded up on necessities for the week). Along with feeling very pleased to be able to converse on a very basic level - such as hello (annyeong haseyo), thank you (kamsamnida) and how much is that (eulmayehyo), we looked forward to going to movies (surprised at the English subtitles) and eating out in intriguing restaurants.
 While my husband and son filled their days with work and school, I began to venture out to discover the real South Korea. Public transportation in Seoul is very inexpensive and unlike some countries, the subway stations are clean and easy to understand. With the Korean alphabet consisting only of 24 symbols, it wasn’t long before I mastered the alphabet and began reading the names of each subway stop as we approached the station.
As my confidence grew, I began to explore some of the famous street markets in South Korea. With travel books in hand, I set out one morning to see the sights at the Moran market with the idea of picking up fresh produce for dinner that night. After walking down aisle after aisle of garden-fresh vegetables, fruits and “really cheap” clothing, I turned the corner and discovered that some Koreans still eat dog meat. While crates of cute little puppies were being sold to families with children, older men were selling “yellow dogs” for evening meals. This tradition still exists, though most Koreans have not eaten this dish and many have attempted to put an end to this cruelty to animals.
Having frequented most of the markets and street vendors, my attempt at learning more of the Korean culture consisted of visiting many museums and monuments. While our weekends were spent driving along the coast and wandering throughout the countryside, we discovered many interesting and picturesque sites. I was determined to continue finding ways to absorb as much of this culture during the two years we would call Korea home.
On one of our weekend outings, with the annoying assistance from “Alice,” the English speaking voice coming from our navigation system, we managed to make a few wrong turns and ended up pretty close to the North Korean border. After quickly making an unscheduled U-turn, along with being on the verge of heart failure, we were soon heading in the direction of our final destination.
Along with travel to out of the ordinary places, I made the decision to join the Seoul International Women’s Association (SIWA). My world opened up to meeting women and men from all over the world. Even though I did not make it to many meetings, the membership afforded me the opportunity to explore the Korean culture through classes and seminars. While taking classes in Hanji Art (Hanji means Korean paper) and exploring side streets where artists displayed their wares, my observations of this culture seemed to trigger a profound desire to find out more about this small country approximately the size of our hometown - Columbus, Indiana
 Living the Life
Once acclimated to the Korean culture, some of our fears and concerns were quickly dispelled. Our decision to select KIS (Korea International School) for our son proved to be a good one. While he was the only foreign student in high school, his ability to adapt and form many friendships made the educational experience easier while providing a unique cultural opportunity for the future. After searching several international schools in our area, we chose KIS for the reason that it provided quality education, while allowing the students to explore global leadership and encouraging community involvement.
South Korean parents place a high value on education. While our son would spend his evenings doing homework, reading or playing video games, most of his Korean friends attended private tutor lessons at a hagwon - a private study school prevalent in South Korea and Korean subcultures in the United States. Almost every evening is spent studying Mathematics, English, Science and other subjects at a neighborhood hagwon, in order to achieve the high scores needed to enter prestigious universities. Although the international schools attempt to promote extracurricular activities and encourage social interaction through sports, many Korean parents insist on private tutor programs with fees up to $10,000 USD per month. While many South Korean families regard education as crucial to success in life, some mothers will take on jobs in the service industry to financially support private lessons for their children.
Whereas education - a system deep-rooted in Buddha’s teachings - may take precedence in Korean households, another fascinating aspect of their culture is the obsession with designer clothes and accessories. On almost every street corner, designer bags and clothing are displayed for passers by to bring home a Gucci or Coach bag for under $30.00 USD. Most of the wares are probably not the real thing. Many locals, as well as foreigners, hurry to pick through the selection before the after work crowd arrives. In Itaewon, located in northwest Seoul, the streets are lined with every imaginable designer purse, luggage and garments ranging from hip-hop clothing to evening gowns.
During our stay in South Korea, we entertained many visitors. Several family members were able to visit, and while the main attraction seemed to be the open markets with all of the irresistible bargains, we made many trips to the outskirts of town. We discovered in a land of much beauty, there exists a mystery shrouded in colorful displays of lotus lanterns and statues of religious figureheads. One of our favorite excursions was to a place called Wawoo Temple. One of the world’s largest reclining Buddha lay nestled in the rolling hills between majestic mountains. Many times, I would stand in awe of such beauty in those mountains and realize that here, in South Korea, we discovered a rare gem in Asia.
Our family celebrated many holidays in an attempt to experience Korea as a local. Gifts of food, soap, toothpaste, vitamins and socks were traditional gift items for most holidays. Our closets filled quickly with enough soap and shampoo to last our entire stay.
 Before arriving in South Korea, our Christmas tree, as well as ornaments and decorations were either given away to our grown children, or placed in storage for our return. When the holidays arrived, feelings of homesickness set in - but with the help of a close friend, we prepared our home for the holiday season complete with a twinkling tree, glittering ornaments and holiday trimmings. After several trips to the underground shopping mall in Seoul, along with a pantry filled with ingredients for holiday cookies, our first Christmas away from home was a festive one.Over the next year and a half, our lives filled quickly with weekend trips to the East Sea and the breathtaking Sorak Mountains. We took vacations to remote villages where thatched roofs and rice paddies brought a sense of reassurance that my earlier images were somewhat intact. Being strangers in a country where there is an unyielding desire to hold on to traditions, prompted a curiosity to learn more about the people of South Korea. Whether it was a trip to the food market for our evening meal, or a subway ride to a doctor’s appointment, I seized every opportunity to live among these remarkably strong people with a solid sense of community.
A Long Way Home
With only a few months to prepare for our return home, the realization that we would soon be leaving this intriguing, crowded, and sometimes confusing land of magnificence, generated a flood of emotions that cannot be described. While saying goodbyes were even harder than imagined, our family felt a sense of loss for the place we now called home.
When the day arrived for our last 14 hour trip departing Seoul International Airport, our final farewell was overflowing with traditional Korean gifts such as handcrafted silk bookmarks, fashionable chopsticks, and quite a few colorful accessories for our home in Indiana. Close friends filled our hotel room with teary goodbyes and promises to visit America. As our hotel in Seoul was connected to an underground upscale mall, we took our final glimpse of the hurried, but carefree lifestyle of the teenagers gathering at the cinema and the adult crowd enjoying their vanilla lattés or steaming cappuccinos at Starbucks. One last breath of a place we made our home. No matter what language barriers exist, immersing ourselves in a foreign culture creates a life where friendship exists, despite your country of origin - a life of friendship without the spoken word. |
