There are many motivations to travel
- adventure, learning, culture - but, hey, a little loving on the way helps.
Here's a guide to getting dates, relationships and old fashioned casual
sex around the world. Excuse the stereotypes, but there’s at least a bit
of truth in each of these statements.
Guide to Dating and Sex Around the World
is easy in Argentina, the people have the typically Latin freeflowing approach
to intimacy. The men will be very protective of their sisters and cousins
so be careful. Lookswise you have stunning brunettes mostly of an Italian
heritage. Enough to make a man go wild. However they are almost all absolutely
nuts. There are deep-seated issues they all carry around. You will get
headaches trying to read how they are hot for you one day and cold the
next. One guy I knew complained to me about an Argentine girl who made
a big deal of inviting him out to dinner for his birthday only to have
her repeatedly cancel their dates. He kept telling me he had to get back
to Brazil where life and women weren't have such serious problems. A trick
that especially works well when dating Argentine girls is to lie and say
you have moved to whatever town you are in in order to study, make up something
like piloting. The girls like to think you'll be more than a one night
fling. One Belgian guy found success by speaking French to girls all night
Argentine guys have suffered from
the neuroses of dating the women for so long that they have gone nuts,
too. On the other hand that means you will get special treatment from them
for not being a crazy Argentine girl. It's not hard to find an Argentine
guy, they were always trying to kiss my American girlfriend whenever I
left the room. Note from EA female staff member - There are more handsome
men per square inch in Argentina than anywhere else in the world. They
take very good care of themselves and seem to be genetically inclined to
Heaven for Western women who've
always longed to hear, "Bali Boy? You want Bali Boy?" There are more blonde
women of a certain age on the arms of young local boys than anywhere else
in the world. If you're a western man, file Bali next to Turkey. In the
Need I say anything? Bangkok is
Disneyland for the horny, cannot get laid back home to save their lives
Western women are entirely superfluous
Not even Thai women like Thai men.
That said, I did consider joining
the very handsome brother of a friend (pictured right) in Northern Thailand
on his rice farm.
Men and Women: Things get pretty
hot on the beach in Brazil. Brazilians are very comfortable in their skins
and there is no guilt whatsoever where the enjoyment of sex is concerned.
To kiss someone means no commitment whatsoever in many cases and is just
part of the evening's entertainment. To spend the night with someone is
also often just an adventure to tell the friends about the next day. It's
a good idea to use contraception as Aids and Std's are more prevalent here
than in most parts. The condom is called a camisinha, meaning a small shirt.
Girls and even many guys live at home until well into their 20's or further
so it's likely to have to be your place or a motel. A night in one of these
costs around $20-30.
the uninhibited spirits girls wear the skimpiest underwear and beach costumes
possible. You'll hardly ever see a girl topless on the beach though, it's
as if that would be immodest but showing 98% of the entire body is perfectly
okay. Brazilian girls are so used to the intense come-ons of the local
guys that they're often touched by the sensitivity and tact of Westerners.
Whilst they may not make the first move a smile is a definite invitation
to come over and talk. You'll rarely get a rude response if you go and
speak to someone.Some girls will come home with you on the first night,
others are just out to flirt and have fun. It's all thought perfectly innocent.
Some girls are definite gringo-hunters and will hang around the ex-pat
nightspots. These speak English and some of them wouldn't mind marrying
to go and live in a better country. Others are just looking for something
exotic. The girls from the rich neighbourhoods aren't usually very impressed
by gringos. They're looking for the big fish in their own culture.The poorer
girls may feel their ship has come in if they meet a Western guy. Don't
lead someone on who thinks you might marry them.You need to learn how to
tell if a girl is a prostitute. If she is she may take you for all you're
worth. The clues are usually a kind of predatory look in the eyes, too
obviously sexual dress and a vagueness whenever you ask what she does for
a living. And make sure she's 18 or over.Once you have a girlfriend she'll
probably try to completely take over your life. Most Brazilian girls are
fiercely jealous and will resent any of your female friends or even any
time you spend with anyone except them. One theory is that they copy their
behaviour from the tele-novelas (soap operas) that they all watch religiously.
These shows are full of passion, infidelity and people being bitchy towards
one another. At the same time she'll help you out a lot and be an affectionate,
Brazilian guys don't wait to be
invited to go and talk to a girl - they just head over and put their arm
around her waist before she's even seen them. In Salvador they even pull
the girl's hair towards them.The guys also wear skimpy swimming costumes
and parade around the beach in Speedo swimming trunks. Unfortunately not
too much is left to the imagination.The guys will pretty much hit on anything
in a skirt regardless of class, colour or nationality. A gringa is definitely
a novelty but few are looking for a girlfriend. Relationships take away
their principal pleasure in life - hitting on girls.
In the Bay Area at least, it's said
that 'polyamory is the new bi'. The days of monogamy are numbered as a
new generation of free lovers keep a whole bunch of relationships going
at the same time. In these circles people don't refer to their long term
lover as boyfriends or girlfriends but rather as their 'primary'.A quick
look on the internet reveals the depth of the world of Californian swingers
and dating and you can be part of it too. Join up under the mature section
of Tribe and see if you can get invited to a 'play party'. These are pretty
much orgies in people's houses or in alternative clubs where the rules
for engagement are only that you should make eye contact before moving
Safe sex is a standard in California
where there has been so much hype about the dangers of Aids and other STD's
that a woman might even ask you to use a piece of celophane over her parts
when you go down on her.
A good way to hit on Californians
is to take a course in palmistry/ tarot/astrology and offer to give someone
a reading. That way you can get intimate and spiritual and predict they'll
go on a date with you. The traveler in California has a natural advantage
in a country that's pretty cut off from the rest of the world. Ham up your
accent a bit and you should get some dates without too much trouble - like
just visualise it, man, like create that cosmic possibility of easy sex
in your mind, bro...
Love at it's most Latin. Possessive,
argumentative and passionate
Catholicism doesn't get in the way
too much of having a good time in Colombia. It's a modern country and full
of life though it's traditional to get to know someone gradually.
There are absolute heart breakers
walking down the street everywhere you go. You can down to the shopping
malls and have a good time just watching them pass by. They tend to be
pretty possessive though. They're also obsessed by the tele-novela culture
and often want to eat up all your time. It's a common story to see foreign
men under the throes of slavery, being asked to do some menial chore every
five minutes in the house. They advise Roadjunky that you should do everything
so badly the first time that you never get asked again. There are strong
tendencies towards the dramatic. If you try to break up with your girlfriend
don't be surprised if she goes into convulsive fits in your arms, declaring
that she doesn't want to live any more.
This is deep in the heart of machismo
culture where men are men and ready to prove it. Boys definitely don't
cry here and feelings are something that belong to women. There are plenty
of exceptions of course but as a rule of thumb it's fairly true.
You get the feeling that men never
really grow up here. They have the enthusiasm of a boy at the age of 40.
I saw a bunch of them wrestling and diving into a swimming pool at a hotel
- finally their wives had to beg the security to stop them before they
Cuban women AND men are Hot, hot,
hot. It's about sex, anytime, anywhere - casual, anonymous, intimate, and
platonic, but Cuban gals can be violently jealous.
Ecuador (by Robyn Leslie)
take pride in their masculinity in this country. Ironically, this involves
a lot of emotional heart-on-the-sleeve behaviour. Part of being a Latino
man is being emotionally volatile as well as being viewed as a firecracker
with the ladies.
Latino men like to believe that their
obsession with sex is innately linked to their emotional maturity, but
let’s call a spade a spade – they are overtly sexually aware and sex plays
a big part of how they create their masculine identity. It’s a lot of talk,
though, and there is sincerity and honesty behind the bravado.
There’s a variety of men on offer
here: lean, muscular, boorish and gentle. A major problem is the glory
and social status of hooking up with a “gringa” or foreigner. Incidences
of sweet-talking for social climbing are apparent, and even if you’re both
sincere – expect to be accused of trophy hunting (or being trophy hunted)
by some sour old women. The advantages are that Latino men are very in
touch with their feelings and passions. The sentimentality can be endearing
and your physical relationships will be quite different from the generic
western cliché. With sexuality playing an important role in Latin
culture, you won’t find it too difficult to meet men at bars, clubs – well,
As with any country where you are
a foreigner, be aware that local forces are at play. Local girls don’t
appreciate foreigners hi-jacking their turf, so if you get involved in
the dating scene here be as sensitive as possible.
These girls are a glorious mix of
Spanish, Indian and African, and take pride in their appearance. Well-groomed
and well-dressed, they tend to be a little aloof and sometimes take some
convincing. Once you’re there, though, they will happily demand exactly
what they want, be it attention, sex or commitment. In return you will
get a loyal and affectionate partner who will throw herself whole-heartedly
into making you happy. This is an unusual mix of self-assertiveness and
submission which some men find irresistible or mind-bendingly annoying.
Generally, dating in Ecuador will
result in an extension of your friendship base – you will be introduced
to all and sundry, and his/her closer friends will make your well-being
their special project – it’s all part of the group mentality. The notorious
Latino temper is fictional in Ecuador (apart from the standard drunken
idiots), but be aware that some men like to think they can get away with
a bit of sex on the side.
Land of English gentlemen and ladies?
Think again. The days of 'No sex please, we're British' have long gone.
you find yourself in one of Germany’s major cities, plonk yourself down
at an outdoor cafe, pretend to read a newspaper and spy all the people
walking past. Germans are well-dressed, athletic, stylish and beautiful.
Unfortunately, when they pass middle age, the meat and potatoes diet starts
catching up with them and they tend to hang on to the fashions and styles
of their youth. But when they are young, you can’t help but admire the
beauty hidden beneath the business suits and designer jeans.Meeting people
is rather easy, and you will seldom come up against a language barrier.
Younger people tend to meet at bars and clubs while older adults move between
their circles of friends. Germans, both men and women, are surprisingly
flirtatious and more Frech (cheeky) than they will admit. Eye contact is
important, and you need to be confident but not arrogant.
The vision is of some blond-haired,
pigtailed, buxom Heidi with her voluptuous body wedged into a blue and
white Dirndl several sizes too small, and carrying ten glasses of beer.
These women exist of course but it’s normally those ten glasses of beer,
the ones you have drunk, which makes Heidi look attractive.
German girls are fantastic. Born
and raised in an equal country, women are dominant in most facets of life,
except in top-level business but they understand that that’s too stressful.
The girls like to laugh, have a good time, and will probably drink you
under the table. They are not exactly used to being propositioned in the
streets and most hate Machismo men, but they are flattered by attention
This vision is of a BMW driving
bank clerk with a stringy moustache, hair a little too long at the back
and a little too short at the front, a can of beer close at hand and Duran
Duran blaring from the car stereo. German men are known as being insensitive,
self-serving and cold; of course, that could be the description of men
It’s important to remember that many
German men live at home for a long time, even after they have done their
national service. Don’t expect them to be domestic wonders, nor be surprised
when you come home and they’re watching football with a beer in their hands.
If you do everything for them, they won’t try to stop you, but if you order
them around, show some spunk, they’ll find you even more attractive.
Germany’s Sex Industry
Germany is tolerant, especially
in the cities, of the sex industry and sex shops. Hamburg’s Reeperbahn
is the most notorious in Germany for live sex shows and has shops which
sell a multitude of toys the mind could never dream of.
On Herbert Strasse, a street which
runs parallel with the Reeperbahn and is open only to men over 18, the
girls sit behind storefront windows. Don’t be scared. As this is Germany,
it’s all very organised and legitimate. The girls are required to pay tax
and undergo health checks every two months.
Greek couples yell and fight a lot.
They appear surly, and the men are not seductive or gallant. They will
walk right past a woman struggling with weighty bags and never offer to
Greek women are hot-blooded, outspoken,
with largish breasts, prominent noses, and excess hair. Well the older
ones anyway. Younger Greek women are striking, if a bit overmade up and
Greek men prefer blondes. One even
told me that Greeks are descended from Norwegians. Beware that Greek men
have strong sexual preferences. Think Spartan War and long time, no see
Male-female relations in India are
heavily defined by the religion and culture. In theory sex should only
take place in marriage and a woman's virtue and reputation are carefully
guarded. If one girl should commit an indiscretion the shame spreads to
all her sisters too. In a country where just about everything is watered
down or polluted, Indians are obsessed with ideas of purity. Naturally,
this only applies to women who are good for one use and then are defiled
Male travellers aren't really going
to meet any Indian girls unless they find themselves socialising in wealthier
circles in the cities. If you hung around Bombay, Delhi or Bangalore for
long enough and wore the right kind of clothes, you might eventually find
your Indian princess. But most likely it would come with a lot of strings
attached. You see the occasional Westerner that gets married but they marry
a village at the same time.
Likewise, the only cool Indian guys
that a woman might want to meet will be from a wealthier background who
have had the opportunity perhaps to travel and get a little more hip. Their
perspectives on the gender roles are still likely to be a little outdated
though.The rest of the Indian guys are always at the ready but most are
hopelessly immature and only have a vague, Bollywood notion of what sex
is about. Sex education is pitiful throughout India and you can be sure
that any notions of foreplay, female orgasm and sex lasting more than a
couple of minutes are few.
So how did India come to be so repressed,
a country that produced the karma sutra and the erotic carvings to be fond
on temples up and down the land. Well, things change and the culture became
radically more conservative in the last few centuries. Marriage in India
is seen as a duty. Following the example of a god like Rama, Hindus should
marry and procreate not for their own good but out of religious obligation.
Their happiness is supposed to always come second to that.
Dating is pretty un-islamic, according
to the ayatollahs, but behind closed doors in Teheran who knows what you
might find. Okay, maybe in Teheran you could end up dating someone if you
were invited to the private parties of the middle classes. You'd need a
good introduction though and internet dating is highly censored. Otherwise
there may well be people who would love to marry a foreigner and escape
Iran but in that case romance doesn’t come into it.
For the Iranians themselves things
are very difficult. Although the last President, Khatami, asked the secret
police not to disturb young men and women seen together in public, it's
still very difficult for them to meet.
To avoid the persecution of the police
young Iranians pull tricks like borrowing babies from relatives so that
it would seem as though they were married. Or else they'll sit in cafes
and a friend will lean forward to obscure the view as they hold hands.Things
are supposed to be a bit easier if a guy has a car but that's a luxury
beyond the means of most. One of the most common sounds you'll hear in
Iran is that of a frustrated young man's sigh as he dreams of what must
go in in California.
Israelis are some of the most beautiful
people in the world with a hundred races blending together. They keep in
good shape and after a walk through town on a hot day you'll have more
than one reason to need a cold shower. Foreigners have good chances of
getting a date in Israel and as most young people speak English it's easy
Most of them are pretty tough and
have all been in the army for two years. On top of that a lifetime of dating
Israeli guys has made them take no shit. They often take the upper hand
in the relationship and you could, after a beer or two, classify them into
two main types:The Yemenite/Moroccan girls who are dominant, bossy and
full of vitality. They put your life in order and expect to be treated
like a princess.
The Polish/Russian girls who do exactly
the same thing but indirectly. They worry you to death with emotional blackmail
and guilt until you do exactly what they want.I'm kidding, of course but
some of that will ring true to anyone who's lived in Israel. Actually Israeli
girls are wonderful companions who are funny, smart and supportive. They
do have the reputation of being materialistic, though. Not that they want
to buy things all the time but that they assess guys according to their
long-term prospects. Most girl here want a family and with two years already
lost to the army, there's a sense of a hurry to fit in the travel, studies
and career that most would like before starting a family.Some families
will object to their daughters dating or marrying a goy, ( a non-Jew) but
even so the kids would still count as Jewish so it's not a huge deal unless
they're particularly religious. They're not so shy and will often take
the first move. Again many will appreciate a guy who is in touch with his
feelings - a rarity in Israel. It's great to date Israeli girls but remember
that one day they'll turn into Jewish mothers.
Most are in pretty good shape in
the 20's and are muscular, impressive characters. By the time they hit
40, however, they start to go bald, get fat and grow hair on their backs.
Perhaps it's the influence of the army but Israeli guys are renowned for
locking their feelings away. They're taught to be strong types from an
early age and they hide a lot of their sensitivity under a tough skin.
Israeli guys are often very forward and many are just out for the sex.
There's many good, caring guys though and still water runs deep. And Jewish
guys can talk and are actually trained by demanding mothers to giving women-pleasers,
especially in bed. It's more of a problem for an Israeli guy to date
a goya, or non-Jewish girl - if she has kids they won't be Jewish. I've
seen some cases where the rabbis have bent over backwards to rush a woman
through the conversion process before a kid is born.
The beach, bars and even the street
can be good places to meet someone. Israelis are also very connected to
the internet and jdate.com is a site in English where you can try your
is about as kinky as sex around the world gets. Cute doll-like girls and
frustrated salary men, love hotels and pornography everywhere. Japanese
society is quite openly erotic in some ways with massage parlours broadly
advertising their soapy service. Yet on a personal level the Japanese are
painfully shy and most of the time it will be up to you to make the first
move. Kissing in public isn’t really on but there’s no shame in suggesting
a visit to the nearest love hotel. The love hotels themselves are a kind
of neutral territory equipped with condoms, maybe mirrors and sex toys.
Some even have outlandish décor such as medieval castles or Arabic
harems. Figure on paying $60 for a night or half that for a two hours stay.
You’ll be paying computerised staff anyway so as to cause less embarrassment
to the clients.
Both Japanese men and women are heavily
programmed by society as to their gender roles and this is something that
is only changing slowly. If you’re looking for someone with independent
spirit you’re best off looking for a girl or guy that has travelled.
The whole relationship thing is especially
problematic for this painfully shy people. There even exist agencies to
assist with the break-up process. In some cases a woman might be hired
to seduce a husband and have photos taken with to be used as blackmail
- then he’ll have no choice but to divorce his wife who was too afraid
to say that’s what she wanted in the first place.
For some city girls dating a gaijin
is something like having a life-size fashion accessory. There are clubs
where Westerners and Japanese girls meet and the age range is usually set
by the particular bar. Most Japanese girls have been taught to be utterly
submissive to the needs of the man and will often follow you around from
room to room. They rarely express any real desire of their own beyond perhaps
being bought something ‘kawaii.’ In bed Japanese women are famous for outrageous
screams of orgasm even before sex has actually begun. Some have speculated
that this stems from the performances of the porn actresses in a life-imitates-art
kind of scenario. Whatever the reason it can be a little alarming the first
time round when your girlfriend begins to shriek in ecstasy for no apparent
Japan is a good opportunity for less-attractive
Western men to score well. The Japanese have a rather different conception
of what makes a good-looking Westerner and many guys can reinvent their
sexual prestige here. Hence the cartoon “Charisma Man":
Japanese men are famously reticent
when dating and though they hold high-pressurised containers of emotion
within, they’re too shy to ever express any of it. Many marriages sour
because of the absolute lack of communication and the divorce is accepted
with hardly a word. Dating obsequious women all their lives, Japanese guys
often haven’t developed a great deal of personal charm. On the other hand
they can be very sweet and loyal which some women find makes a refreshing
change. Just don’t expect an honest answer to “How was it for you?” afterwards.
Aaaah, Mamacita! Tight jeans, machismo
culture and girls wearing too much make up. No one is more sentimental
than the Mexicans when they date someone.
Mexicans are amongst the most sentimental
people in the world and at least half of their sex education comes from
the tele novelas. “Ay,” They’ll sigh when they fall in love after a couple
of hours, “Mi tesoro, mi cielo - te amo tanto!” (‘Oh, my treasure, my heaven
– I love you so much!’) And they’re being quite serious, too. Naturally,
it’s easy come, easy go but in the moment they can be quite taken away
and speak to their lovers in a species of baby talk. Frankly, it can be
Mexican girls are educated to a very
strict idea of femininity and are dressed in pink from day one. They wear
tight, tight jeans to show off their figures and a bare mid riff is often
a compulsory element in their everyday attire. Their mothers drill them
on the use of make up from the moment they go to high school and it’s still
only women allowed in the kitchen.
Admittedly, things have moved on
from 50 years ago when it would be a disgrace for a women to leave the
house alone, the home being her nest and domain. Yet for many Mexican women
the only ideal is to find a husband to support her. And preferably buy
her lots of accessories in the meanwhile. So when dating Mexican girls
you’ll usually be expected to foot the bill, walk on the street side of
the sidewalk when you stroll together and to do all the romantic stuff
like in the movies. Find somewhere starlit, buy flowers and then say all
the things you’d never say back home for fear of breaking down laughing.
In short male travellers should do
what Mexican guys do when they want to date foreign women. They arrive
with devastating eye contact and a sultry, breathless look; they place
one hand on her cheek and say something like:“I have never seen anyone
as beautiful as you in my entire life!”
Mexican guys often don’t quite know
what to make of independent Western women and can only fall back on their
ingrained machismo. That's cool if you're an old-fashioned kind of gal
but might be a little tedious otherwise.You’ll find more freedom of the
sexes in places like Mexico City where in the fire of the metropolis attitudes
have softened a good deal. But even though there are plenty of liberal,
cool Mexicans out there who escape the gender roles the sentimental streak
Mexico is more liberal than many
other countries in Central America though as the Catholic sense of shame
has faded a good deal in the last few decades. It’s no problem for most
Mexicans to have a one night stand and still face their family with a clean
conscience the next day. There’ll be no shot gun marriage scenarios unless
you’re really out in the sticks somewhere.
No problem getting a Moroccan boyfriend.
Date a girl though and you date her whole family. Moroccan women are gorgeous
but they’re a package deal. You could well meet a girl from university
and date her but you’d be expected to marry soon afterwards. And that means
marrying half her family also who would then need loans, visas to Europe
Moroccan guys get big status kicks
out of dating Western girls but you’d be hard pushed to find any that know
the first thing about women’s rights. You might find more open-minded souls
in the more modern cities of Casablanca and Tangiers.
Moroccans are all Muslim to a man
but it’s rarely that strict here. In the cities you’ll see women walking
around in tight jeans and it’s not taboo for young couples to have discreet
relationships. Virginity should still be preserved but the guys tell us
they get creative.
The Moroccans are very confident
and have a good deal of charm and style to them. Not many women here opt
for veils and in the cities may prefer jeans. To this extent in the major
cities Morocco can be as sexy as it gets in the Islamic world. Head out
to a night club though and you'll see just a bunch of guys in their cool,
fake Levis. The Yemenite/Moroccan girls who are dominant, bossy and full
of vitality. They put your life in order and expect to be treated like
someone in Pakistan is one way to start a blood feud.
Yeah, right.If you’re a woman looking
to date a Pakistani guy, you could probably take your pick. Not only are
white women exotic, they’re also a ticket out of the country. Don’t expect
your potential partner to know anything about women’s rights, freedom of
religion or foreplay, however. Ok, in Karachi and the upper classes of
Islamabad and Lahore there exist classes of people who are more world-conscious
but it’s hard to meet these kind of people when you’re on the road; they
live in walled communities, protected from the masses.
If you’re looking to fall in love
with a Pakistani woman you’ll be risking a rifle down your throat in much
of the country. The newspapers in the south occasionally feature the story
of a runaway couple from the Pakistan country and the murderous pursuit
of the girl’s relatives.
Pakistan just isn't the kind of country
where a man is likely to get a date.
Dating Russian girls and guys is
as easy as it gets. You don't even have to go to Russia to date a Russian
girl. They are everywhere. Not, however for the politically correct..
For guys, Russia can be a hell of
a shock – there are loads of women, and a lot of them are very, very good
looking indeed, and charming with it. Just look at the huge number of marriage
and dating agencies on the internet if you are in doubt.
There is no feminist culture to speak
of in Russia, and girls try hard to dress (or rather, undress at times)
to impress men – or at least it seems this way. The population is actually
female–heavy (mostly because men die earlier). This means girls have to
go the extra mile to get husbands, and given the number of beautiful women
around, competition is even harder. Many people say WW2 is also still a
factor – after 1945, there were very few men left, so girls had to compete
hard for them, and attitudes have been passed on.
Either way, dating girls here is
like shooting fish in a barrel, and this goes for Ukraine and Moldova too
- and the Baltic States where there are large Russian populations. Girls
quite often like to date foreigners even more than Russian men (they’ll
be the first to tell you what they think of Russian men, in many cases).
Inevitably there are passport-hunters, but a lot of Russian women just
like foreign men more, if only because they have more money and drink less.
Russians are often pretty direct
people too, and appreciate expressions of emotion. It would definitely
be wrong to say all Russian women are “easy”, but if you can’t get a date
here, go home and forget about it forever.
Prostitution is pretty widespread
in Russia, especially in Moscow and other big cities. They tend to congregate
in the sort of places foreigners are found – hotels, clubs and bars. If
a beautiful girl in revealing clothing does start making eyes at you in
a hotel bar, it’s safe to assume she’s not just being friendly because
you look nice. If you do get any action, remember that HIV is spreading
here in a big way. Around half the prostitutes in St Petersburg, for example,
are thought to carry HIV. Cases of foreigners getting drugged and robbed
by hookers are also fairly common.
For foreign women, Russia is not
so great. There are cases of foreign women finding Russian men, but given
the competition from the hordes of Russian lovelies, it’s hard work, and
most Western women wouldn’t want to bother anyway.
Male-female attitudes tend to be
rather old-fashioned, by European standards. Men do men’s things, girls
do their stuff. Girls expect men to pay for things, and expect men to approach
them for a date if they are interested.
you're a woman who hasn't turned a head in a while, get yourself to Turkey.
Turks are blind with lust over Western women regardless of their weight,
advanced age, complexion, whatever your perceived faults back in America,
Turks will make you feel beautiful.
They also see no conflict with having
several girlfriends AND a wife, a holdover from the days of the harem,
when you could tell a man's wealth by how many wives he had. The word monogamy
does not exist in Turkish male circles, and the women just “don’t ask”.
On the other hand, there are few divorces, as the wife tends to remain
the “primary” for life.
If you are a western male, cross
Turkey off of your list, at least for the near future. Turkish women do
not go out with Western men.
Observations and advice about sex
and relationships in America could probably fill a multi-volume encyclopedia.
For all the brazenness of programming like Sex and the City and the free
love movement of the '60s, things are not quite that simple and easy. Fear
of HIV is a major obstacle, and scoring a date does not mean things will
women may make Desperate Housewives, but that doesn't mean they're all
hungering for sexual encounters. If a girl has a strong Catholic or conservative
upbringing chances are she'll want much more than something casual. In
fact, people still get married very young in the southern states, around
19 and 20, and divorces at 23 or 24 are becoming more common.
Young people do like to 'hook up'
especially at the bars and party scene. Different places attract different
crowds by age and status, the working world does happy hours in the early
evening and clubs and lounges at night. Clothes matter and you have to
look go, smell good, and use hair care products. At the college bars it's
more open and friendly but everyone seems to know everyone already. Alcohol
is a major factor everywhere.
American girls are easy compared
to girls in other countries, except that they usually have more experience
in knowing how to avoid the wrong type of guy. They expect to be treated
as nothing less than equal, and often the only type of men capable of handling
them in the long term are American guys.
Dating sites are a very popular way
for couples to meet. Popular sites are match.com, eharmony.com and the
Roadjunky friends network. Facebook is the most popular social network
for college and My Space is the non-college equivalent.
It's really easy to meet American
men, but it's harder to meet quality guys who are only interested in more
than one thing. 99% of men think that if they meet a girl at a bar they
are going to sleep with her that night. The trick is to balance your behaviour
so that a man doesn't think you're prude but not give in too easily either.
It is common for a man to lose interest in a girl if she sleeps with him
There are distinct types of guys
in America: sports bar guys that wear baseball caps and t-shirts that are
too small, in-shape preppy guys that wear brands like Abercrombie &
Fitch, hippy guys with open-toed birkenstocks you can meet at music festivals,
slick guys who act like they have a lot of money wearing pressed blazers
and large belts, hip-hop guys who are good dancers wearing chains and baggy
pants, and the foreigner guys who don't understand they need to tone it
down a bit.
Sex in America
Men and women often have their own
rooms living apart from their parents at a young age so it is easy to find
Thumb is the author of "Hand to Mouth to India" www.tomthumb.org/travelbooks.shtml.
He is co-founder of roadjunky.com.
Thumb says, "In an age of consumer travel and guide books that repeat the
same old tired cliches and platitudes, Road Junky was founded to put the
spirit back into travel, en-countering the world anew with the spirit of
gonzo journalism, writing about travel with a highly subjective voice."